(A splash of water)

A splash of water
does not a clean hand make, dear
lady of the john.

(Bumped from the bustling break room)

Bumped from the bustling break room
and relegated to the restroom, I wash my coffee mug in the bathroom sink
as my co-worker soils her toilet bowl.

(The courtesy flush)

The courtesy flush
acts as an air savior with
bidet behavior.

(bracing myself for the smell)

bracing myself for the smell
that will, no doubt, result from the sound
I just heard from the stall next door

(Top executive reportedly)

Top executive reportedly
sits on corporate toilet for 45 minutes every day
playing Tetris

Foul Danglage

There's nothing like
being trapped in a public bathroom,
forced to inhale someone else's
pre-fecal farts and foul finale.

("Gee, thanks," I thought,)

"Gee, thanks," I thought,
as she escaped her own stench
and left me in the john, barely breathing.